biological clock

Ever since my final exam has started, my biological clock has fixed....

Wake up early in the morning, and before 12am sure will go bed....

It's extremely normal till unbelievable.....

y unbelievable?

Coz lots of my frens they study till early in the morning, or dont sleep at all....

Totally reverse from wad i'm doing currently...

Yesterday, around 10pm i already lie on my bed and started to fall asleep.....

10pm man~~~Next time how am i supposed to stay until late night?if i hav some night activity?

But also due to this, i found out actually bed early got lots of benefits.

Firstly, can concentrate more during day time...

Secondly, skin complexion appears fine...

Thirdly, u'll find u got more time to spend within one day, RELATIVELY....

Well, i hope i can maintain it EVERYDAY....errrr, like dis meaning i cant go club or hav some night movies with frens????hahahha, maybe once in a while shud be ok ba....

Hehe, 2 papers left.....happy happy....^^

^.^

Finally......i can get on9 again....Well, dunno wad had happen wiv the wireless in my college last few days, cant access to internet at all....luckily today OK edi...lolz....

Well well, 3 more papers to proceed then i can bid gdbye to my first semester.......so faz....>.<

N the study mood seems like fading as time goes by....

Yesterday rite after i finish my Hubungan Etnik paper, i hav cooked 'hong kong' drama-- Moonlight Resonance for 3 hours, after dat watched 'Anaconda 3'>>>'Sex And The City'...Wow, wad a movie day for me....

So today....NO MORE DRAMA, NO MORE MOVIE K???CONCENTRATE IN MY PHYSIOANATOMY.......

I'm looking forward 4 my sem break........hhhahahaa.......

Adiosa~~~^^

重伤~

这次跌得很重。。。
过了一天，心情还是很烂，很蓝。。。
第二次崩溃了。。。
这次散落满地的心，真的不知道要从哪里开始收拾。。。
朋友都叫我不要想太多，
我说，
给我几天的时间。。。
我也知道几天的时间有点长，
我也知道一个小考不是大学四年的一切。。。
但这一跌真的是太重太重了。。。
重到我需要去见DR.KO，整个Forensics Department最大的head。
都是给那个'except'的字害死，
再给那个 'Discuss in length bone information that u can obtained from a bone.'险到，
我觉得整part MCQ，我是拿0的。。。
essay part那个bone information就拿多一粒0了。。。
下个星期去见DR，我怕我又再一次崩溃。。。
告诉我，
要怎样追回来？
senior说sem 1是最好score的，
我的mid-sem test 都烂到这样，怎么办？
我真的不知道我几时才会‘回来’，
信心真的完全没有了。。。:'(

sick of study!!!

so sick of study!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
study physioanatomy seriously can make me throw up!!!!!!!!!

randomly....

Well, juz woke up at around 11am...so long nvr sleep till tis late, feeling tired still, coz i slept at two laz nite.....

Haha, yesterday rite after finish my chem 2(i hope i got short-term memory lost, i dunwan recall of any exam paper that i hav sat...oh!!!!7 marks ar!!!!!u c.....haih....)me, kelly, wen shiuan, sook yien, chai n sean, 6 of us went to klcc to watch movie, ya, in school uniform, except chai, he changed to his activity shirt.5 of us juz wear like dat n lepak in klcc, yeng rite??haha....we bought ticket first after went to kim gary hav our lunch....wow, eat till so full....haha...then cam whore here n der...well, sorry, cant post rite now, coz those nice nice photoes aren't in my hp....

After treating our stomach, we back to the cinema.We watched wad sumthing emporium, till now still no idea wad's the movie called.i tell u, the movie juz OMG, langsung tak tau wad's the point, no climax, then suddenly i saw 'sarikata oleh', then i said,
"huh?end edi ar?wer's the climax?y like dis de?"
6 of us juz very zadao....haih,i still prefer horror n ghost movie....neway, there's still one thing i found in this movie, dat's is believe in urself that u can change dis world....it's juz dat the story line makes me feel bored...

After finished the 'zadao' movie, we lepak for a while...then go home le, so faz....coz kelly cannot tahan edi, she's sooo sleepy n sook yien hav to back earlier as she lives quite far....so chai send me n sook yien to pwtc then he send others back.....

Called my dad asked him to fetch me after dis....waited for so long in pwtc....i juz hate dat station...i would nvr like to take star lrt at nite!!!!

Ei, my dad drove tonite wor....rupa-rupanya my parents wanna go to damansara looking for my aunt...lolz, of coz i wanna go oso, long time din meet up wiv my aunt n cousins edi....ya, still in my school uniform, dat time was 9 sumthing at nite...

Reached der, my cousin sis borrow me her shirt n i took bath der, then chat a lot, bout stpm(oh, juz stop thinking of dis!!!!), bout f6 life, bout my new school SJI n bla bla bla....whereas my parents n my aunt went out for fun....waited them till 1 sumthing in the morning oni they back....Then back to my own house, change cloths then sleep>>>>that time around 2 edi....

Conclusion for the day,
1.was not in mood after i know my careless mistake in chem 2, n make me lose quite lots of marks....
2.was not feeling well, it has started when i woke up in the early morning, ate medicine b4 going to school, ate again another panadol b4 i enter exam hall, i juz feel so sick....:(....
3.kim gary not bad, but...
4.movie so so....
5.i still hate dat area, hate dat station, hate taking star lrt at nite, becoz i still hate him, ya, maybe for my lifetime, unless i meet wiv accident n suddenly lost my memory, then dat's diff story...
6.i miss my cousins, i miss my hometown, i miss everything dat i leave n waiting for me at my hometown...
7.so happy, coz left one bio 2 only......hahahaha.....

Guess wad, i'm going to dye my hair later....hehe, ya, is later....8888!!!^_^

~i luv u guys....unforgettable birthday celebration~

Gosh, rite after i post my previous article, i received chai's call. Actually i'm waiting for him coz he said later eight sumthing wanna cum to my house, need my help to do something, then suddenly he called me n said he cant cum today coz he involved in an accident, near the corner outside my house....dis guy, i tell u, he seriously can get award edi....it's juz so true...then he asked me whether wanna cum out n c or not...i juz so panic, pc oso forget to off, then run to downstairs....*sorry for those who chat wiv me till halfway then no reply from me*

Then the 'terrible' thing is here, suddenly i saw sean is walking outside, n i saw chai holding a cake wiv candle lighted....oh my gdness, i juz cant believe it....i saw chai, sean, wen shiuan, kelly n kelly's bf....they sang birthday song to me, but half way i blow the candle off edi, coz the candle is going to finish melting....i juz soooooo touched...first time my fren celebrate for me.....i'm sooooo happy, cant describe the mood now...i juz remember i keeps on 'beating' chai's shoulder n said:"y la u said u accident, i reli thought u in accident de ar......"n seriously going to cry, touched+panic....so naughty, they all....sobbing....

After finish eating the cake, we went yam cha at naili's place....lolz, always there...my comment for my sweet nineteen.....thanks for being my fren, i'm so glad to hav u all as my fren.^_^
~me....cutting the cake.....marble cheese from secret recipe...yummy yummy.....^_^

~kelly, me, wen shiuan n chai, sean at behind....jeffery as camera man, lolz.....wad a memorable day.....

Specially dedicate to:

~chai: hey kawan, betul-betul very appreciate u....i'm so happy today...but next time oso dun use 'accident' la, i reli thought u r involved in accident de leh.....neway, reli reli thanks to u n making my first second turn nineteen so memorable....luv ya~lolz, dun misunderstood, luv u as my ji mui or heng dai, haha, either one la, i dun k to becum a boy....n thanks for ur companion all these while regardless i'm sad or happy.^_^

~wen shiuan: hey darling, thanks for every moment that we spend together...eventhough we r in different class, but still we got lots of things to share wiv....luv ya always, muacksss.....^_^

~sean: lolz, actually we juz becum closer fren since this year....remember the day where we always gossip b4 tuition wiv all of them??miss those time...thanks for today oso......^_^

~kelly n her dear: Thanks for giving such a big suprise to me, reli unexpected...so glad to hav u as my fren,helped me a lot n we shared a lot too...^_^

Reli speechless, coz tonight everything juz seems so unexpected....i din expect my birthday can be so suprise(maybe i'm not used to it?), n juz now when looking at the clock, i actually thought:"3 hours left, then my big day juz pass like dat...", i thought no one will celebrate for me juz like the years b4....somehow things might change....n i got it tonight....so touched.....

My wishes:

*i wish all the ppl around me(those who luv me n those i luv) will happy n stay healthy always...

*i wish i can get gd result in my stpm n enter u+getting the course i wan....(lolz, still hav 4 more papers to go, i hav to study harder if wan to achieve gd result...)

*laz one....i keep it for myself....i wish_____________________.

Conclusion, stpm is hard....

Fiu......time passes sooooo faz, i hav finished half of my paper, four left, but that's where the nightmare start>>>bio 1, maths 2, chem 2 and bio 2.....oh man, i scare paper two, hav to write lots of essay....argh!!!!!well, let me make a summary regarding to the paper that i hav sat.

~PA(1)-dasar was hard, kenegaraan ok, calculation ok....conclusion, did so many past year oso no use coz less than 5 questions r past year questions...

~PA(2)-whole paper actually not reli tough, but dis paper is very time concerning where u hav to finish 2 essays(250-300 words), 2 short comprehensions, one graf, n one question regarding to info transferation within 3 hours....wad u hav to do is keep ur mind clear n keeps on writing, non-stop....seriously got no time for double checking, juz scare i accidentally used short form....

~chem (1)-calc was tough, theory ques oso not easy...no past year...sigh....conclusion, i finished up my M16 bullet while doing dis paper, means>>>tembak la....

~maths (1)-huiyo, ini lagi teruk, mampus kao kao....first ques oredi ruin my confidence n slow down my momentum...then i start panic-ing, second ques oso cant do...then, keeps on recalling wad mr.han has told us:"dun fall in luv wiv the question that u dunno, juz move on...", so i skip n skip, finally oso back to the same questions, dis time can do edi coz my mood has adapted to the situation...conclusion>>mpm plays trick wiv us....n one thing very funny, after we finished the paper, n turn my head around, saw sum of my frens shaking their head, means wad?tough lo....n yes, very very de tough, no past year, no trial-like question, no other's schools' ques-like oso....

Final conclusion>>exam smart is more important than everything(study hard n study smart).....n took chicken essence before u enter exam hall, very effective, seriously can keep ur mind clear throughout the hours....however, almost fall sick today after i took chicken essence for 4 days consequently...besides, i ate choclolate each time i enter exam hall....y?coz chocolate can raise our glucose level in blood n calm us down, if u're too nervous or wad....so, actually abit headache now....too heaty edi....

well, today is my birthday too, but ntg special....still i wan to thanks to all my frens that had wishes me,sms me thru hp n frenster.....thanks...^_^
the most important is, thanks to my parents for bringing me to dis world, especially mommy, coz i know giving birth is very very de pain.....thanks....^_^

~c u guys LATER~

Well, juz wan to tell all my dear readers, i'll tutup kedai for almost 2 months time.....Y???!!!!becoz stpm is cuming soon, reli reli soon.....soooo scary man!!!!! n honestly, i'm sooooo tense up for the time being...one word, PRESSURE!!!!!!!!ARGHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So think will oni start blogging after i finish my stpm, n oso cum back from my trip, most probably.....lolz.....well, if any special events+i hav spare time, i'll blog...neway, i dun think i'll hav extra time....n my routine juz study study n study then sleep, for the time being, dun hav special events oso.....

So, c ya after 2 months.....will miss u guys a lot....miss me too wor......*blek*.....^_^....GD LUCK for myself, my frens n for those who r taking stpm n spm for year 2007....^_^

GANBATTE!!!!

Today is 19/10/2007.....i left exactly ONE MONTH to prepare for my stpm.....muz fight till the end....GANBATTE!!!!!

To all the stpm candidates, ganbatte in ur studies.....dun on9 for sooo long oooo...........^_^

Well, very longing for the life after the scary exam......Dad said will bring me to Langkawi n Penang after my exam....k, looking forward to dat.....Beach, sun-shine, cam-whore, i'm cuming!!!!!!^_^

holidayz.....but ntg to happy bout it...

sigh, holidays again....weird rite?for a student, i supposed to be happy as i need not wake up early to go to school....but for me dat means time passes so faz....i dunwan sit for exam but i wan the life after exam.....of coz cannot i know, so i still need to study hard+smart(hopefully) for the exam....i hate my life for being so bored for the time being...i hate myself for not doing the thing dat i actually like....sigh, wad to do, dis is another kind of life when u cant manipulate it, so i oni can endure the hardship that i had finally chose......it's not a fate actually n honestly....juz i dunno how to enjoy my life...wad a sad story....

however, i'm doing sumthing rite now where the result oni will be showed next year....hahha.....~renovating myself~....i know it's rather odd to use 'renovate' on a human being, but so far dis is the most suitable word i found, to describe my current situation....lolz, hopefully will success ya.....n glad to say dat, i've got strong determinationin in doing dis coz i luv it, enjoy it n proud of the result, erm, i mean soon....haha.... wad i need juz time...n money....hahhaha.....wait n c ya.....^_^.......cy.Low will reborn thoroughly....NEXT YEAR!!!!hahahha.....am i thinking too far?now oni october.....lolz, nope, i MUZ get it done by next year, so i muz on the timing now....

kkk, 'bite my teeth tightly'(lolz, direct translate from mandarin, juz ignore it if u cant understand, doesn't matter) to live thorughout my october, nov n early of dec, then i reli can fly edi.....can u c my body is growing feathers?lolz..jk, i was a physics student k, bird can fly isn't due to its feather, but is due to their body shape which apply the bernoulli principle rite?haha, luckily i still remember....hopefully it's correct.......:P

Well, i would still like to take dis opportunity to wish all the muslims 'selamat hari raya aidilfitri', if there is any malays reading my blog....n to all the students, happy holidays...for all the spm n stpm candidates, happy holidays n study hard+smart during the holidays.....n for those who dun hav holidays, stay happy always, enjoy ur life, dun be like me, so dead, k??haha, k la, better stop crapping.......take k everybody......^_^...hav a nice day ya.........:p

累。。。

~不曾干净过的书桌。。。
觉得自己快变超人了。。。现在的生活routine就是早上五点多爬起来，去学校，两点这样子回到家，休息一下，三点多开始温习功课，读书到晚上十一点。。。很变态对吗？当然没有non-stop，读两个小时，休息一个小时，不然就睡个半小时。。。然后十一点多十二点才睡，等待明天的到来。。。这就是我现在的生活，星期六星期日除外，都会睡迟一点。。。

觉得生活还可以做更多事情，只是看自己愿不愿意牺牲。。。但现在是关键时刻，真的不能松懈下来。。。说真的，为了stpm，我真的牺牲不少。。。牺牲我回乡下的时间，牺牲见朋友的时间，牺牲想做自己喜欢的东西的时间。。。

之前说过，考完试过后要学跳舞，我也在怀疑，真的做到吗？怕自己做工后又没时间。。。这样的话，多久后才会有？也许自己的time management出了问题吧！

人生，除了无奈，还是无奈，很多时候，自己走的路，都不是为了自己而走，是为了世界而走，但却忘了，世界并不会因为自己而停下来。。。

你们知道吗？我比较喜欢以前的自己。。。以前那个比较有感觉的自己。。。现在的感觉都不翼而飞了。。。拥有得多，又怎样？都不充实。。。其实这种感觉一直都在，只是现在也比较无所谓，因为习惯了。。。‘习惯’，一个可怕的名词，它会让你忘了做一样事情的最初原因。。。

这种忙碌的生活不能持续下去，再这样下去，真的会变行尸走肉般。。。很庆幸自己还剩大约一个月的时间，然后一定要彻底地改变自己，physically as well as mentally。。。

想过个比较简单的生活。。。其实做个单细胞生物也挺不错的。。。我懒嘛，懒得思考，懒得动，懒得想。。。外面的事情，不想理太多，因为有时连自己的都不是很想理了。。。

难。。。

第一次觉得读书很难。。。拿回一些试卷了。。。bio omg，paper 2才score一半，paper 1 okla。。。数学，满意啦。。。其他，不是很有眼睛看就对了。。。
唉，还是给bio老师shoot了几round。。。开始觉得bio很难读。。。我能不能call去mpm告诉那里的工作人员我不想考？
还剩下一个多月。。。一定要死命‘煲’书了。。。
希望考完后，妈妈答应让我和朋友去旅行啦，解压嘛！:p

Yay.......

Yay, finish my trial finally....well, relax for one day, say 'NO' to books for one day....

Well, after my last paper, 11 of us (li jia, pei sun, kok loon, wei loon, yi juin, siao huoy, wen shiuan, sook yien, siong voon, sean n i) go to times square to watch movie....b4 dat, we went for lunch at u-village first.....of coz, 11 ppls gathered together, sure got lots of funny things happen one.....after dat, go to times square n meet up wiv chai then oni go for movie....'The Invasion', not bad...shout for several times, lolz......i was so sorry coz my 'screaming' frighten wen shiuan, haha, lolz, darling, i did it but i din meant it......plz forgive me ok??hahaha.....well, overall the movie quite nice.....

After the movie, go for bowling.....well, it was my first time playing bowling, n my result sux la.....bottom 2....haha, call me 'queen of longkang'......XD! n i broke my nail....sob sob......

well, now very very tired actually.........dunno, tired+not reli in mood today....so, not reli talk much throughout the outing....sorry pals...neway, outing wiv u guys still very nice....next time ajak again ya.........^_^

Fr!daY....

Friday bio student got no paper, so quite relax dat day.....still need to study somehow....:(.....well, after finish schooling, oni 12.30pm....me, chai, kok loon, wei loon n sean oni will go for tuition at 4.20pm, so middle lepak in class, kononnya study...adalah, u c below....hahahha


~asked them one maths question, 'probability'.....this is the consequence....4 guys garu their head dunno for how long........lolz.....

~finally sean change his posing....i doubt is dat help??lolz....then sumthing funny happen...but i din take photo......lolz.....

After the afternoon session came up, we oso bla n av our lunch somewhere nearby our tuition centre....then they accompany me to sinma, coz i wan to buy hui's birthday present.....met ai yen n soo in the middle......

~two same bracelet, one for me n one for hui.....carved 'h & y' on both....

Finally, nite has arrived.....billy came n fetch me first, then followed by john n hui....everytime feel happy when i c them...........^_^....jia oso came for a while...hey, take k of ur throat ya.......

~me n our birthday gal......ying n hui.......muackssss.......

~ordering some fd.......not bad........promote promote naili's place..........lolz...nice environment.......reli nice.....

~hui is talking to john.....hahha, curi-curi snap......

~hui n i before leaving.......

~john, hui n billy........

~again me n hui......happy birthday in advanced ya..........^_^....luv u so much.....

After reached home, received hui msg :"Hui here...thx neh...i like d bracelet very much..u very sayang me, i reli can feel it..i luv u..haha..u tired le..sleep tight lo...muacksss...."

Haha, hui, we fren for ten over years edi, of coz muz sayang each other la....true fren is not easy to find especially after we grow up, so i reli treasure u guys a lot, my primary yam cha gang, my secondary sis and my frens in st.john...^_^

.....

预考进行到一半，很多张试卷都枪毙了。。。可能自己没有很努力地读书吧！读的没有出，没读的却出到‘五颜六色’（在乱用成语，哈哈！）
明天没有试卷，所以才会上来crap一些东西。。。不知不觉，还剩一个多月就是真正考试了。。。我竟然要在我生日的时候考maths paper 1。。。悲哀。。。
努力！！！下个星期的paper一定要score!!!!!!

“离开你之后”。。。

呼。。。终于要考完试了。。。剩下一张relatively简单的，因为全部ABC，不会做还可以用M16。。。难考的都结束了，感觉真好。。。还记得开始考试前一天，睡前可以明显的感觉到脑袋在急速收缩着，也许太压力了，所以赶快哼些调子平缓一下，我的脑袋明天还要用来考试的叻。。。只能说，这次的年中考有些很难，有些ok，应该没有人会说很简单。。。考完了，也不想去想太多。觉得这个星期五很有可能拿回化学考卷，我的化学老师做事的效率很快，我们也习惯了。时间真的过得很快，死命k书的情景仿佛昨日。。。

很好，今天能轻轻松松上网，blogging等等。。。

回家之前，在PWTC轻快铁站meet了我的干妹妹。。。她说她要继续拿华文，所以将我的stpm华文书二手买了过去。。。今天放学后趁还有时间翻了一下。。。那三本书新得可以，自从转校后就没有时间翻过它了。。。四科都不是很能了，不用说多拿一科华语。。。说真的，好久都没那种熟悉的感觉了，太久没真正地读‘真正’的华文。。。这次，我真的可以说我的华文退步了，blogging用的华文也越来越口语化，不过也好，太机械化给不了人家一种亲近感。。。华语，一个我可以说永远都不会放弃的东西，虽然stpm我没报考华文。。。华文，是我写感觉的媒介语，不能少了它。。。

说到干妹妹，紫莹，很可爱的女生。看到酱可爱的女生叫我‘姐姐’，我会忍不住很想疼她。。。跟她很投缘，谈着谈着，问她如果我想收她做我妹妹，ok吗?哈哈，她也很开心的答应了。。。我也很开心。。。Yew Joe幸运，在PWTC站遇到他，就在当场介绍紫莹给他。。。交了书，在YJ的电话传了几首歌，就回家了。。。好久没在四点多的时候在titiwangsa车站等巴士了，果然，jalan TAR很塞车，我最讨厌的。。。不过，sms朋友打发时间。。。有朋友陪伴，时间真的会过得快一点。。。在巴士里，遇到一位妇女。。。知道她很久了，以前穿着浅蓝色的校服就一直在巴士看到她。。。气质好得让人忍不住想多看几眼。。。还记得她在几年前怀孕，现在还是位漂亮妈咪。。。她刚好坐我的旁边，不晓得为什么，直觉告诉我，她是个很幸福的女人。。。直觉，就是那么不可思议，无法解释。。。喜欢靠直觉做事，懒惰思考吧！靠直觉做事，很危险。。。有一些人在自己的生命中，就只是静静走过，但你却会对她/他印象深刻。哪一天在某个街头遇到他，你还会想说：“欸，是他！”。奇妙。。。

突然想到一件事情，有时现在认识的朋友就是类似这样交回来的。以前一起补习的，都不曾讲过话，也不曾打过招呼。就在毕业后的某一天，某一个街道碰面，大家却笑了起来，就这样变成有说有笑的朋友。。。缘分，总是爱迟到。。。干妹妹也是，同校了那么多年，都不曾熟络过，现在却变成电话已拿起来就可以谈上几个小时的‘妹妹’。。。

听着不懂谁唱的“离开你之后”，满满的感觉又回来了。。。开始慢慢觉得其实很多事情不用太执著，有一天他/她/它终会离去，一个人来到这世界，最终，还是一个人离去。。。如果是我的话，回忆我也不想带走，有些回忆很美好，但相对的，也很沉重，就让它盛开在它最美的地方，足够了。。。学会放手，让自己快乐点，也让对方快乐点。。。

“离开你之后”，歌唱技巧没有很花俏，就是很清淡的一首歌。歌手淡淡的唱完这一首，我也静静的听完这一首歌，多希望自己是一位驻唱歌手，喜欢那种淡淡唱完一首歌的感觉，整个人也变得轻松。。。有些东西不用修饰，也很美。它难免会有缺陷，但这些就是我们有眼睛的人也看不见的缺陷美。。。

~一个小故事想和大家分享：

那个被人遗忘了的角落，有谁会知道每个清晨的周会，有一个几乎被我们这群看得见的人遗忘了。。。每次发现国歌播放完毕后，他就一个人静静地走掉。。。他，圣约翰国中的一位盲人老师（resos teacher)。。。没跟他说过话，但我总会注意到他。。。我特别喜欢跟寂寞的人做朋友，因为他们可能被世界遗忘了，所以我想陪他们。。。善用你们的眼睛，去看一些平常人看不到的细节，你就会发现很多。。。试下看着陆地的积水，你会看到另一片更大，更美的天空。。。